Day 27: The First 9 Insights

i spent most of my day today
rereading the Celestine Prophecy
reacquainting myself with the first nine insights
i had forgotten so much of it
or maybe I'm just more ready to receive the information
than i have been at any time before

i am so easily able to see today
how i have let my higher energy repeatedly fall away from me
how i have recreated my birth story
over and over and over again
letting the drama play itself out one more time
and then one more time
and then of course, one more time again

refusing to simply learn my lesson
what i came here to overcome
being too stubborn to submit
and therefore unable to move forward with my life purpose
i finally see today
that my mother taught me how to be bold
courageous
how not to settle
how to walk away when necessary
how to fight for what i know is right
how to have dignity in the face of trial
and she did all of this by being the exact opposite!
i had to play out her story a hundred times
before i could finally find my own

and my father showed me how to respect myself
love myself, honour, nurture and care for myself
by bring the exact opposite!
he treated women like monsters
objects
free trade agreements
and so i had to play that story out
a hundred times
in order to find my own

and yet my father also taught me how to be free
adventurous
independent
a gypsy
a traveler
musician
laughter
huge amounts of laughter!
joy
fun
athletics
perseverance
commitment
never giving up
he gave me so many gifts
i can finally now separate the gifts from the lessons
and set the lessons free

and my mother showed me
anger
rage
regrets
food addictions
calorie restriction
control
dominance
religion
the power of the church
over eating
over working
obesity
trying to look perfect
make up
fancy clothes
tight leather skirts
disconnect from nature
disconnect from animals
over spending
fear
and so many more things
that i had to work through on my own
to get me to here

and yet they eventually created this woman in me
with the strength
to finally set all of that free
ready to live her soul purpose
and my soul purpose is the combination
of the energy of both my father and my mother
of all of the lessons pooled together to make my contribution to the world

i am here to learn how to connect with the masculine energy
in a healthy, healing way
to rise above distrust, fear, hurt, pain, jealousy, cheating, lying
to connect with a man of purpose, integrity and passion
that is ready to co create the vision with me
of a paradise here on earth
a utopia of love, trust, honouring, connecting, intimacy
to connect with the earth, with nature, with all of life
together, as a team, as a unit of strength, purpose and vision
to rise above everything i was ever shown and taught
and by rising above my own family story
thereby assisting the entire world
in moving through and beyond the dominance of the masculine
and the fear and the mistrust of the feminine
and finally allowing them to unite as one
coming together as a whole complete symbiotic circle of light and love